Yesterday was convocation, that hallowed time when seniors put on graduation robes and sit in Jarman to hear a keynote speaker describe how they are the future of our nation  are gluttonous consumers poisoning our planet and leading to the quick death of humanity.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Kudos to anthro professor Walter R. T. Witschey for not giving a boring speech about sustainability.  What he gave was a very angry speech about sustainability – grinding a big ole axe against the graduating class for their consumption.  We’re sure he didn’t plan to get steamed, but going to the lectern and staring out at a cretinous congregation of double-chinned sororiety girls is enough to make any tweedy professor loose his shit.

And how!  At one point, Witschey used the Mayan civilization as an example of why we should protect the environment.  We were puzzled.  What, exactly, does the ficticious civilization of a 2006 Mel Gibson flick have to do with sustainability?  Maybe he was thinking of Mad Max.     

Anyway, we were just about to create a Facebook group for Witschey when received these photos.

Oh, no. 

Oh, no.

Our advise to anyone else who wants to badger the student body about sustainability: drink from the water fountain.  Because we all know how terrible those empty bottles are to the environment, right?  Isn’t that what killed the Mayans?

This entry was posted on Friday, September 11th, 2009 at 6:17 pm and is filed under Awkward, Hypocrites, Politics, Professors, Ridiculousness. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.